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Throw the books at ’em
The NCAA put Nebraska on two years’ probation for improperly distributing nearly $28,000 in textbooks and other school supplies to athletes for a four-year period.
Of course, as anyone who’s shopped in a college bookstore can attest, $28,000 amounts to only 10 or 15 textbooks.
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This ought to be short
“They’ve figured out a way to make sure the Super Bowl pregame show won’t last too long this year,” noted comedy writer Tim Hunter. “Right before it starts, Kim Kardashian is going to marry it.”
‘Convenience fee’ is extra
Among the top 10 questions to ask yourself before spending $16,000 on a Super Bowl ticket, from CBS’s David Letterman:
• “Do they have anything in the more affordable $15,000 range?
• ”Can I afford it after spending $12,000 on a Pro Bowl ticket?
• “Isn’t this why the rest of the world hates us?”
Tee him up
Mavericks coach Rick Carlisle was ejected from Wednesday’s game against the Thunder — and faces a possible fine — after he booted a basketball wide right of the ref and into the crowd.
On the bright side, though, he has been offered a placekicking tryout with the Baltimore Ravens.
Roman holiday
This is the first Super Bowl appearance for Pats receiver Chad Ochocinco.
Or as he prefers to be called this weekend, Chad LXXXV.
Quote marks
• Patriots QB Tom Brady, at Super Bowl media day, on growing up with three sisters: “They dressed me up a few times in their clothes and painted my nails once, but it was nice.”
• NBC’s Jimmy Fallon, on Americans expected to eat 450 million chicken wings on Super Bowl Sunday: “Or as Thanksgiving turkeys put it, ‘Who’s laughing now, chickens?’”
• Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle, on reports that diva receiver DeSean Jackson might be a 49ers free-agent target: “Sure, then sign Terrell Owens as the wide-receiver and life coach.”
Easy on the ice, please
In Apple Valley, Minn., police arrested a man at the local rink on suspicion of DUI — while driving a Zamboni.
No wonder his eyes looked a little glazed over.
The Seattle Times
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