Neil White's weekly rankings of the SEC and ACC are a thoroughly unscientific compilation. No computer programs were used and no votes were taken to assemble this list of best to worst in the SEC and ACC. However, several boards - Ouija and dart - were used as guidance. And all ties were broken by a best two-of-three in rock-paper-scissors.
1. ALABAMA (7-0)
Don't think "Rocky Top" will be played much this week.
2. LSU (7-0)
Never miss a local story.
With Auburn coming in, Tigers will be everywhere.
3. CLEMSON (7-0)
Shootout win over Terps keeps the Gatorade flowing.
4. ARKANSAS (5-1)
Razorbacks should go hog wild against the Rebels.
5. SOUTH CAROLINA (6-1)
Gamecocks need off week to recover from Lattimore loss.
6. VIRGINIA TECH (6-1)
After two solid wins, Hokies get a breather against BC.
7. GEORGIA TECH (6-1)
Cavaliers pull out Yellow Jackets' stinger in big upset.
8. AUBURN (5-2)
NCAA gives clearance to program. Bring back Cam Newton!
9. GEORGIA (5-2)
Close win over Vandy has all the coaches barking.
10. FLORIDA (4-3)
After three straight losses, Gators can't wait to take week off.
11. NORTH CAROLINA (5-2)
Blown away by Hurricanes, Heels now face Tropical Storm Dabo.
12. WAKE FOREST (4-2)
Loss to Hokies brings Deacons back to the real world.
13. VIRGINIA (4-2)
Huge win over Georgia Tech has Cavs ready to send Pack packing.
14. FLORIDA STATE (3-3)
Seminoles defeat Duke to restore regular order to the ACC.
15. MIAMI, FLA. (3-3)
Doesn't get easier after UNC win with Georgia Tech next.
16. TENNESSEE (3-3)
First LSU and now Alabama? Vols get pushed off mountain top.
17. VANDERBILT (3-3)
Commodores to be given marching orders by Army this week.
18. MISSISSIPPI STATE (3-4)
Gamecocks send message to Bulldogs: Less cowbell!
19. DUKE (3-3)
Dukies play fellow overachievers Wake (not in Quiz Bowl).
20. MARYLAND (2-4)
Don't look now but Clemson just scored again.
21. N.C. STATE (3-3)
Wolfpack didn't play last week and nobody noticed.
22. OLE MISS (2-4)
The entire state of Mississippi stays winless in SEC.
23. KENTUCKY (2-4)
Can't play defense, can't play offense. Anything else?
24. BOSTON COLLEGE (1-5)
Eagles found a way to lose a game in the bye week.