Sports

Sports Talk: Trapper John is no Drew Brees

WOW, WHAT A great Super Bowl last week. The Saints pulled out an historic victory as a record 106.5 million people watched on television.

That's more than the 106 million who watched the final episode of "M*A*S*H" in 1983. I watched that show, too, and liked the Super Bowl a lot better. By the time "M*A*S*H" ended, it stunk. As soon as B.J. Hunnicutt grew that lame mustache, the show began to tank.

Really, after the departures of Henry Blake, Trapper John and Frank Burns, the show was never the same. I can watch any episode from the first five seasons on DVD over and over, but anything after that is a hit-or-miss proposition, especially the last few seasons, when it basically stopped being a comedy.

Thank goodness there were no cast departures during the Super Bowl, or I might feel the same way. If Drew Brees, Reggie Bush or Peyton Manning had left the game late in the second quarter, that would have had the same effect on my viewing experience. But the game stayed exciting until the end, unlike Hawkeye Pierce, whose crackling dialogue grew stale by the 11th season.

Now it's time to get to the rest of the week's top sports headlines, right after my wife opens her Valentine's Day present - a Super Bowl XLIV "Who Dat" T-shirt I found on eBay for $9.99.

Saints upset Colts to win claim first Super Bowl victory. If only people in New Orleans knew how to celebrate.

Manning throws crucial interception in Super Bowl loss. Let's see ESPN make a clever commercial out of that.

Super Bowl ads assailed for not being funny. Except for that one for CareerBuilder.com about casual Friday, where everybody walked around the office in their underwear. Now that was funny.

The Who rocks the Super Bowl at halftime. Sure, Roger Daltrey needed a walker to step up to the high notes, and Pete Townshend flashed his pot belly while he did his famed windmills, but I'll still take them over Lady Gaga any day.

Florida State vacates 12 football wins in academic cheating scandal. No problem. Tommy Bowden is going to give Bobby those 12 games he won at Tulane in 1998.

Danica Patrick survives crash-filled ARCA race at Daytona to finish sixth. She dodged more cars than I did in the snow-filled Piggly Wiggly parking lot Friday night picking up milk and bread.

Thirteen-year-old football star gives commitment to Southern Cal. Of course, by the time the kid gets there, Lane Kiffin will be at his sixth school.

Milwaukee Brewers to erect statue of commissioner Bud Selig outside Miller Park. This is one case where I'll be rooting for the birds.

Kobe Bryant to miss NBA All-Star game. Yet one more reason not to watch.

Andy Roddick's wife appears on cover of Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. Who needs Wimbledon when you've got Brooklyn?

New Cardinals hitting coach Mark McGwire will refuse to answer steroid questions in spring training. And he isn't going to discuss his attempts to turn Albert Pujols into a .250 hitter either.

Pac-10 says timing is right for expansion. Northern Iowa and Weber State are touching up their resumes.

Atlanta Braves make offer to Johnny Damon. Would that be the short-haired Johnny Damon or the long-haired Johnny Damon?

American skier Lindsey Vonn may not compete in Vancouver Olympics due to shin injury. Maybe she could slide down the hill on her belly.

Lindsey brothers acquitted of charges in connection with barroom brawl in Alabama. Now that they're no longer playing for the Gamecocks, they can fight all they want.

UNC basketball team has lost eight of past 10 games. Even Duke fans are feeling sorry for the Tar Heels. OK, maybe not.

Carolina Hurricanes to move top minor-league hockey affiliate to Charlotte. Everyone in Raleigh has long said everything in Charlotte is minor league.

USC defensive coordinator Ellis Johnson has his compensation doubled to $700,000. And you thought there was a recession.

Apolo Ohno goes for gold again at the Winter Olympics. Honey, look, it's the guy from "Dancing With The Stars." And he's wearing ice skates!

Daytona 500 kicks off NASCAR Sprint Cup series. Or, as it's better known these days, the Jimmie Johnson Invitational.

Frank Thomas retires from baseball. The Big Hurt takes one of the sport's best nicknames with him.

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